Guide to yogurt making: all the tips and tricks

I have been making homemade yogurt for five or six years. What began as a quirky hobby and means to save money has become so natural to me that I don't even think about the process, the advantages, or the unusualness of this activity anymore. It's really quite a simple and forgiving process, but there are many ways in which to damage (or think you've damaged) the finished product.

You see, because yogurt-making is a somewhat long but mostly hands-off process, the easiest thing that can go "wrong" is forgetting that you're making yogurt at all during one or another of the steps. Then comes the frantic Google search as you try to find out if you've ruined it all (spoiler: you probably haven't). In some cases I found ready answers, and in others I had to experiment and learn from the results.

So, with half a decade of experience in over-culturing, over-cooling, boiling, and forgetting my yogurt, I have decided to create the guide that I needed when I began my yogurt adventure (you know, be the change you want to see in the world and all that).

Guide to Yogurt Making: All the Tips and Tricks

The Supplies

You do not need a yogurt maker to make yogurt! Most likely you already have everything you need in your own home.

• A yogurt starter (more on this below)
• Milk
• A stove and pot to heat the milk
• A kitchen thermometer
• Glass jars with lids to hold the yogurt
• Some means to keep the yogurt at a consistent temperature for culturing. You can use a yogurt maker if you have one, but I've heard of using the pilot light in your oven, hot towels, a cooler filled with just-boiled water... You can get creative. My personal method is a heating pad on medium heat, inside a small cooler with a towel draped over the top. This works quite well for me, but I've also tried the boiling water and pilot light methods and had moderate (though less consistent) success with those as well. You may have to play around with it to find what works for you; make sure to test the temperature of your yogurt the first few times to get a feel for how it's working.

On Yogurt Starters

There are websites that sell so-called "heritage" yogurt cultures. They claim that commercial yogurt starters (i.e. the starter used for any yogurt that you'd buy in your grocery store) are not as viable as heritage cultures. The idea is that once you start a batch of yogurt, you can use a spoonful from that batch as the "starter" for the next batch, and thus have a self-perpetuating system so that you never have to buy yogurt again. According to these companies, commercial starters are not capable of indefinitely self-perpetuation and "wear out" after 3–4 batches.

In my early days of anxious yogurt production, I bought these heritage cultures multiple times and tried to build a lasting yogurt starter from them. Some people may be able to perpetuate their yogurt indefinitely from these heritage starters, but my experience was that after some number of batches (5, 8, 12, whatever), my yogurt stopped reliably producing more yogurt, and I'd have to buy more cultures and restart.

After spending more money than I should have trying to make the heritage cultures work, I tried the not-recommended method of using a spoonful of yogurt from the store (my rationale was, a quart of store yogurt costs about the same as a single heritage starter, but you can eat the rest of the container of yogurt, so if it doesn't work, at least you get something out of it). The result? I have still had to restart my yogurt cultures from time to time, but less frequently than with the heritage cultures! (In fact, sometimes I restart on purpose — when going out of town, for instance, it's easier to let the cultures die and just spend the few extra dollars buying a quart of yogurt when I get back, than trying to time my yogurt production exactly around travel).

Note that brand does make a difference; I have had more success with "nicer" brands like Nancy's than the cheapest store brand.

Lastly, make sure to make new yogurt every 5–7 days; yogurt is perfectly safe to eat after seven days, but after that the cultures may not be sufficiently active to produce more yogurt (though I've had success up to Day 9 or so).

The Process

Making yogurt is really quite a simple, forgiving process, but there are some key steps:

1. Heat milk on low heat till it reaches 180ºF. EDIT: I used to heat on the lowest heat possible, which would take more than an hour. However, heating milk for that long can result in grainy yogurt. Heating too fast can cause curdling, though. So now I set the temperature at one or two notches up from the lowest setting.
2. Remove milk from stove and cool to 105–110ºF. (Estimate an hour + for the heating/cooling process!) 
3. Put your yogurt starter in your glass jar (~1 Tbl yogurt per quart of milk), pour in a little of the cooled milk, and whisk. Once smooth, pour the yogurt-milk mixture back into the pot and whisk gently.
4. Pour milk mixture into jar (s) and culture at a steady temperature of ~105ºF for 3–24 hours.
5. Remove yogurt from culturing environment and chill.

That's the simple part — but what happens if something goes wrong at one of these steps? Is your yogurt a lost cause? That's what the section below is all about (organized in chronological order for steps 1–5).

What can go wrong

What if I forget my milk on the stove and the temperature goes above 180º?

Your milk is still usable! Just remove from heat and proceed to step 2. (I actually think yogurt sometimes turns out a bit thicker this way, though I still try to avoid heating beyond 180º because higher temperatures destroy more of the milk proteins.)

What if the milk is taking forever to heat and it reaches 167º and doesn't want to go higher?

Be patient! You can turn the heat up a little, but not much. There is something special about 180º; if you stop before you reach that temperature, your yogurt will not be as successful.

What if I forget my milk while it's cooling and it drops below 105º?

Your milk is still useable! Return to stove and heat on the lowest heat until it reaches 105-110º and then proceed to step 3.

What if took too long to heat/cool the milk and now I have to leave my house while it's still cooling down?

If the temperature has made it to 180º but you don't have time to wait for it to cool to 105º, put a lid on the pot so it will cool more slowly. If you're not away too long, it might not have dropped below 105º when you return, and you can just proceed to step 3. If it drops below 105º, just return to stove and reheat to 105º. I've even had good results putting the heated milk in the refrigerator overnight and reheating to 105-110º the next day and making yogurt at that point.

What if I forget I had yogurt culturing and it stays in its culturing environment for hours longer than planned?

Note there is a wide range for culturing times (3–24 hours), so if it goes a little longer than planned, don't sweat it. The longer yogurt cultures, the more sour it will taste (because the yogurt cultures are eating the sugars in the milk), but it's still edible and viable. The sweet spot for me is 5 hours, but I have no problem pulling it out after 4 or leaving it for 8 if that's what works best for my schedule. Make it work for you and don't stress it.

What if I test the temperature during/after culturing and it's fallen below 105 or gone above 110?

Figuring out how to culture yogurt in your environment may require some experimentation, but you'll likely figure it out after a few batches (for example, I found that I could make significant changes to the temperature by adjusting my heating pad between the low, medium, or hot settings, or adjusting how many towels I put on top). See below for the various effects on yogurt texture from culturing too cool or too hot.

What if my yogurt looks kind of thin and wobbly when I pull it out of the culturing environment?

Put it in the fridge before you despair — the chilling time really does help firm up the texture.

What if my yogurt turns out thin and runny?

There are various reasons why yogurt can have a thinner texture than expected. This is more common with raw milk, for example (see below). The temperatures really do matter — stopping the milk before it reaches 180º will result in thinner yogurt, and a culturing environment that falls below 100º will also result in thin, runny yogurt.

If you've followed all the steps correctly and it's still thinner than you'd like, you can strain it: line a strainer with a clean tea towel and place over a bowl. Pour the yogurt into the strainer and place in the fridge for 1–5 hours, until the desired amount of whey has dripped out of the yogurt (leaving you with thicker, "Greek" yogurt in the strainer). You can then toss the whey or use it in a variety of ways (protein in smoothies, hair wash, add to dried beans when soaking, etc.).

What if my yogurt's texture is grainy, lumpy, or otherwise inconsistent?

Heating your milk too fast in step 1 or culturing your yogurt too hot in step 4 is the most likely culprit for curdled texture or separation. Heating milk for too long (i.e., too slow) can also cause grainy textures, too, though — there's a happy medium on a low (but not the very lowest) temperature that allows the milk to heat evenly.

Of course, some inconsistency in texture is normal (especially if you use milk that's not homogenized — expect to have a "cream" layer of yogurt at the top). After the yogurt has chilled and before eating, you'll want to stir it.

What if my yogurt totally fails to culture and all I have is warm, weird-smelling milk?

Let it go and try again. You'll get this.

Miscellaneous Tips

How long does homemade yogurt last?

Quite a while for eating purposes (I've kept it for a month, though that's probably not recommended). After about a week, yogurt cultures are no longer sufficiently viable to make more yogurt, though.

What kind of cultures do you need to make Greek yogurt?

This is a trick question! There are no cultures specific to Greek yogurt — Greek style just means that the yogurt has bee strained. See the question above about fixing thin yogurt to learn how to go about this.

How do you make your yogurt more or less sour?

The sourness of your yogurt is mainly dependent on how long it's cultured. The longer you culture = the more sour the yogurt. Fiddle around with it to figure out how you like it.

Can you make yogurt from raw milk?

Yes, this is what I always do! However, heating it to 180º means that it's technically not raw anymore; you've essentially home-pasteurized the milk. Early on in my yogurt days I attempted recipes that only heat the milk to very low temperatures, thus keeping it raw. The issue is that the healthy bacteria present in raw milk are then competing with the yogurt bacteria. The result is that the yogurt never gets very thick (it's more like kefir at this point). Since I eat yogurt for the benefit of the fermented cultures anyway (not the raw milk bacteria), I've made peace with the slow, low pasteurization process that allows those bacteria to take over the milk and produce a thicker yogurt (though commercially-pasteurized milk probably still makes an even thicker yogurt). And, by heating the milk very slowly and capping it at 180º, you can still maintain the integrity of the milk proteins, which are destroyed by ultra-high temperature (UHT) pasteurization, the method used to treat most commercially-sold milks.

That's it for this guide to yogurt making! I hope my experiences are helpful to someone else trying to get started in this world. 

Happy spring,

Thoughts on health and cognitive dissonance

My diet has evolved greatly over the years. 10+ years ago we were a typical bagels-and-cereal family. Pop tarts were a rarity and we bought the plainer cereals, so I thought we were doing pretty good. Early in my elementary years, my mother began to read more about health and the bagels all but disappeared, while [now organic] cereal was relegated to Sundays. We began adding things like buckwheat porridge to our breakfast fare and reducing prepackaged dinners. Fast forward a few years (with various minor diet changes) and my mother decided to try an anti-fungal diet, which involved eliminating all sugars completely (I mean, seriously, you could only eat green apples and berries. Occasionally.). I put up a fit about this, but adjusted. Then we became friends with a passionate vegan. Not only is she passionate, she is educated. She showed us documentaries, articles, and books all demonstrating the detrimental effects of animal products and the revolutionized health of those who decided to eschew them. I began to feel that, while I would never want to be a vegan, it was no doubt the ideal state of being, if we only had the will power to live that way. We ate less and less meat, and, never being a huge meat eater, it became unappealing to me. For several years, I was pescatarian (I never gave up fish entirely). Along the way, I had picked up the idea that if the National Dairy Council a doctor suggests you eat something, you should definitely do the opposite. 

Then our diets changed again, by necessity this time, and it became clear that avoiding meat was simply too difficult. Not that I ever started craving meat, but it was one of the few things on the menu. I had really become a vegetarian by habit; I was sure there were good reasons to avoid meat, but I couldn't really explain it. I remembered reading that the highly-touted calcium in milk wasn't actually abled to be absorbed by the body, though I didn't know the exact mechanism by which this was explained. We were also gluten-free at home, but this too had become habitual over the years, and, without a good reason to avoid it, I continued to indulge in wheat when traveling, with friends, etc. 

For a while, I had an "everything in moderation" philosophy, and just generally tried to avoid engineered food or eating the same thing more than three times a week. I tried dairy free a few times, but often ended up caving in to eat my favorite breakfast, yogurt and granola. So I just ended up with a lot less diary and a lot more guilt. 

Through all this, I've been what most people would consider "healthy." My weight is fine, I don't have any serious health concerns, etc. But I have had persistent skin issues, and lately, my teeth have become seriously demineralized. Of course there is a place for conventional medicine and diet alone cannot change every problem. However, I have tried conventional medicine, to no avail, and I also believe that what you eat each day is either healing your body or the slowest form of poison.

Not wanting to face my first cavity or pump my body full of fluoride, I read the book Cure Tooth Decay by Rami Nagel. Similar to the paleo approach, this book is based on the research of Weston Price in the early twentieth century, when he studied the diet of primitive populations who had excellent health, especially oral health. He found that dairy and meat were not the culprits: many of the societies he studied consumed meat, eggs, and dairy on a daily basis. By contrast, grains and sugars were either absent, or extensively prepared, by soaking, cooking and/or fermentation. In reading this book, I have come to the reluctant realization that my nearly-vegan, high carb diet was either the cause or collaborator in destroying my teeth.

However, this causes a lot of cognitive dissonance. After believing in the value of veganism for so long (at least believing that animal products should be consumed in small quantities), it is hard to accept that all of that wasn't true, at least for my body. Wait, you mean I should be drinking milk daily? So is the medical profession actually right about this? What about other things?

Now, if you look a little further into my diet plan (modified paleo/keto), you'll see that it's a far cry from the Recommendations By American Medical People. Yes, I'm accepting the need for milk, but I don't think it should be pasteurized or antibiotic raised. Contrary to the mainstream acceptance of combining sugars with added vitamins, I believe in getting nutrients straight from food and eliminating sugary foods not found in nature. And most revolutionary of all (to me), I'm going to drastically decrease my grain consumption. What if vegan advocates were looking at the Standard American Diet and thinking the animal products were the reason for such ill health in America, when really its the grains that are the culprits? (Plus the opioid epidemic, the antibiotic age, vaccinations, GMOs, pesticides and over-processing of food).

Going grain-free works out, since my mum has been working towards keto. I've been decreasing the grain content in our meals already (looking at you, almond flour and spiralizer!). But oh my goodness, friends, no oats in my yogurt??? I did without yogurt for more than six months. Now that we're back together again, I'm not sure I can break up with my oats.

Summarizing the tooth protocol I have been following, then:

• Using remineralizing toothpaste from Wellness Mama
• Oil pulling (I'll be starting this in June, when I'll have more time in the morning) 10-20 minutes a day
• Eating nearly grain free, and for those grains I do eat:
• Brown rice: soaking to remove phytic acid. Soak brown rice in water 16-24 hours. Reserve 10 percent of soaking liquid (discard remaining). Cook rice with clean water. The next time you make rice, add the 10% soaking liquid reserved from last batch. Repeat this cycle. As long as you have some starter on hand, almost all the phytic acid is removed.
• Oats. The author does NOT recommend oats in any way, but he also made a point of saying that if you ARE eating grains, you can somewhat balance the effect by making sure you have a healthy fat with it. For me, this means yogurt/granola, yogurt in pancakes, etc. If I'm still not noticing effects I will *gulp* eliminate it completely.
• Eliminating most sugars
• I was already doing this for the most part, but I'm going to stick to these three added sugars: honey, maple syrup, stevia. 
• Avoiding high sugar fruits as much as possible and combining with a healthy fat (e.g. green apples and cheese)
• The author pointed out that teeth can drastically improve from just one good meal a day, even when the other parts of the diet are unchanged. This is encouraging to me, because the thought of overhauling my diet is intimidating, even as a person who has done this multiple times! Luckily, as mentioned above, my parents are starting the keto diet, and several of the protocols (emphasis on healthy fats and protein, grain free, avoidance of high-carb fruits) match up with the remineralizing recommendations.
• Upping my vitamins C, D &A and calcium uptake through broccoli, bell peppers, sauerkraut, cooked green vegetables, grass fed dairy products, and cod liver oil
• Bone broth as much as possible. I haven't yet felt comfortable drinking this by the glassful, but that is one of my goals for June.
• Possibly trying blotting: curetoothdecay.com/blotting

I'm excited about the possibility of healing my teeth, but also tentative. I don't doubt the ability to heal oneself through diet, but I doubt my ability to read my body and know what is best. It seems like there is so much contradictory research and debate, along with real life stories of healing on all sides. However, I'm also super excited about combining my dietary experiments with homeopathy! My mother and I have started a homeopathy group to learn more about this fascinating, time-tested medicine and I have been so encouraged to hear the stories of people who have been healed. If you've never heard of it, I suggest you check out https://studygroups.joettecalabrese.com.

That's all for today, friends. Because some people might go into shock if I post three times in two days. : )

P.S. How do you feel about home birth?

Quite A Lot To Say

Good afternoon, one and all! I mentioned a few things in my 'Little Letters' post in July that needed follow-up, and besides, things have happened since then that were not mentioned at all.
(I'm going to do this professional blogger style and have lots of pictures in this post. Because that's totally necessary to look professional.)

I have a reason for all the pictures, except this one. I just like it.

First of all, I mentioned A Tale of Two Cities. What I did not say, was that I am now an avid Dickens fan and immediately started listening to Bleak House.
What I also did not say is how poorly I am following the Classics Challenge. I really wanted to read my July and August books, but I have been doing school and reading tons of history books (non-figuratively speaking, I'm sure there's been close to one ton of books) and have had precious little time for reading that I can't justify as productive. Yes, I am still plugging away at Lord of the Rings. When I have time for it, I eat it up quickly, but time is of the essence.
I have also put it aside several nights in a row because I have wanted to read North and South by Elizabeth Gaskell for a very long time (I've had it checked out from the library for more than four months), and since I was studying the Industrial Revolution it was a good time to tell myself it was For School. It has been good from the beginning, but at first I'd switch off between it and LotR. Last night all the bones in my body were sort of melting because it was so good and I have no one with whom I can speak of it, as no one in my family or circle of acquaintances has read it! Which also presents the problem of who will watch the BBC miniseries with me when I finish...

But back to the Classics Challenge. I'm currently studying The Civil War era in history, but haven't yet started any other of my subjects. Next week, that will change. I'll be doing Calculus, Physics, a literature group, and another class in addition to history. My reading time is only going to shrink. So rereading The Chronicles of Narnia and the Anne of Green Gables series may not happen. I'd love to so much, but I have more books in my drawer of next-ups, and four or five on my shelf that I've never read at all. Rest assured that I shall do my best to finish the last two months (books that are not rereads) and post about them here.

Moving on, I do have some good news! My sister and I now have a knight in shining armor. We share him with some jealousy but he is open-hearted and treats us equally, I think. Sir Jeffrey is a silver 1999 Honda Civic and we are very happy to have him.

Also, we went camping in the beginning of August and took these Instant Oatmeal Packets. It was my first time actually camping for more than one night, and I liked it quite a bit. I'm now obsessed with the Instant Oatmeal packets. I loooovvveee oatmeal of all kinds. And also millet is really good. My family is going to be doing a grain-free diet soon, so I will get them only rarely, or if perchance I make breakfast alone (I'm alone half the time anyhow so that shouldn't be too infrequent).

I'm also rather obsessed with 1850s dresses currently.

Another thing mentioned in the Little Letters post was drama. Well, for better or for worse I am directing The Eskimos Have Landed, which has nothing to do with Eskimos and everything to do with history, old ladies, and New England. I have a cast of five girls and I'm excited for it. I am acting in a play for the seniors of the group called The Cop and the Anthem, taken from the O. Henry short story. (I'm a waitress and an Irish cop, which is rather funny because I've been an Irish cop before in Arsenic and Old Lace, spring 2013).

I've been writing a fair amount, and I'm 300 words into Chapter 10, of thirteen. The thirteenth is planned to be very short, mind. So in essence I have three chapters left. Then of course it'll be back to the beginning in second drafts. I may take a break and pursue a short story or dabble in something else first. That will enable me to be openly critical about everything instead of it being my newly-birthed darling who shouldn't be touched. Since I wrote a Twelve Dancing Princesses short story in Fall 2014, the beginning of school and autumn weather always puts me in both a short story mood and a Twelve Dancing Princesses mood, which means I have put three or four TDP books on reserve at the library and am excited about finishing Arthur and looking at something else for a while.

I'm also desperately trying to find space in the coming months to hold a ball. Everything is on the drawing board right now, so there isn't much I can say about it, but I wanted to share the above image. For it's so true! Even my dad noticed me doing rock steps while doing dishes.

That's all for now, folks.

Blueberry Peach Crumble Muffins – Gluten-free, Vegan and Refined Sugar-free

I saw this post I wrote a year ago, and I thought to myself "Wow, that would be a good muffin". So I adapted the Chocolate Cherry Muffins that I posted in June, as follows.

Blueberry Peach Crumble Muffins

Prep time: 10  minutes
Cook time: 25 minutes
Yield: 12 muffins

Ingredients

3/4 Tbl flax meal
2 Tbl and 1 tsp water
2 cups gluten-free all purpose flour
2 tsps baking soda
2 tsps baking powder

1 tsp cinnamon1/2 tsp salt
1/2 tsp xanthan gum (if your mix does not have xanthan gum, increase to 1 tsp)
1 1/4 cup milk of choice (I used unsweetened non-GMO soy milk)
1/3 cup agave nectar
1/2 cup and 1 Tbl canola oil
1/4-1/2 tsp liquid stevia*
1 Tbl vanilla extract
1/2 cup blueberries

1/2 cup chopped peaches (each piece should be about 1 centimeter cubed)

1 1/2 Tbl Earth Balance 

1/2 c oats

3 tsp cinnamon

Directions

Combine the flax meal and water in a small bowl. Let sit for five minutes.
Preheat oven to 325 F. Line a muffin tin with paper liners or spray with oil.
Whisk dry ingredients in a large bowl. Whisk together wet ingredients (including flax mixture) in a medium bowl. Form a well in the dry ingredients and pour in the wet. If the mixture is too dry, add a little more milk. Stir well, then fold in blueberries and cherries. Scoop 1/4 cup batter into each muffin cup. 

In a small bowl combine Earth Balance, oats, and 3 teaspoons of cinnamon. Place a rounded 1/2 tsp of this mixture on the top of each muffin.

Bake 25 minutes or until a toothpick comes out clean. Let the muffins sit in the pan for 10-15 minutes before removing to a cooling rack.

*These muffins are not very sweet. If you like your muffins sweet, add the full amount of stevia.

Namarie,

Little Letters July 2016 ~ or Vacuum Cleaners, Limeade and 90°+

It has been a while since I've written about my life, and so I thought I'd do another "little letters" post to elucidate my state of affairs.

Dear CPU-2T,

I love you. I could just leave it at that, but you deserve more. Your energy, your trim figure, your cheerful color... There is much to admire about you even from a stranger's persepctive, but few can understand the relationship we share. It is unfortunate that there is no legal basis for a marriage with one of your kind. Let me simply say, that there is no one I would rather clean an office with.

There once was an office housekeeper,
Whose vacuum was just a sad peeper.
She was given a CPU
and is no longer blue,
For her new friend's a magnificent sweeper!

Dear Summer,

I have heard you are a pleasant companion in England, Kalaalit Nunaat, and Nova Scotia. There are even some parts of the United States where you are no bad friend. But here, in the Midwest, let me just say that you are abominable. We have had over a month of constant 90°-100° weather, with only half a dozen days of 85° and one blissful weekend of 68°. I. Do. Not. Like. It. I do not like this weather in a box, nor with a fox, nor in a train, nor in the rain (if there's going to be rain it ought to cool the world, not just add to the humidity! One feels cheated!). Please get a hold of yourself.

Dear Limeade,

On these very hot days you are my one consolation (other than my mother, cold black tea, air conditioning, books, and babies). I've never really seen the need for you, since lemonade is so delightful, but when the need arose for a lemon-free and sugar-free drink, I thought I'd give you a try with a bit o' stevia, and voila! You're delicious.

Dear Fleas who reside in the basement,
Get OUT of my house so my poor kitty can come upstairs. You could not be more unwanted if you tried. Just die, every last one of you. (Yes I know I'm a vegetarian and I love killing bugs and I'm a contradiction. Be quiet.)

Dear Tale of Two Cities,

I have heard many poor reviews of your master, Mr. Dickens, but from my personal experience I can now refute them. Your characters are realistic and interesting (with the exception of Lucy Mannette...), your plot is anything but predictable and your writing is witty. Though I am only half done with you, I heartily applaud your maker.

Dear Drama,

It is so strange and sad that this will be my last year acting, and equally strange and exciting that I will get to direct a one-act play. If I could only FIND a one-act play, that is. Directing I'm not worried about, casting I'm just a little nervous for, but finding a script is very trying. 

Dear Breakfast at Tiffany's,

I am so confused. I have so many reactions that I have no idea if I even like you.

My dear, dear, Arthur,

You have reached 91, 530 words, or approximately 366 pages, and yet in all likelihood you will need 8,000 more words before being finished. I am half amazed and half horrified. But there is no "halves" about it when I think of finishing this first draft. Do you believe we've been working together since January 2012? That's over four years. Crazy. There have been ups and downs — goals met and goals failed. Favorite characters who are killed and moments of uncertainty if this work would ever come to fruition. But my dear, I no longer fear that end. 8,000 words seems a large amount to write before I reach the end, but since we've been doing 1000 a day, that's really a very short amount of time.

Dear Future Car,

I would be so pleased, tickled pink even, if you would just get a move on and show up. To say that my sister and I are eager for your arrival is an understatement. 

Dear Tolkien,
I write you yet again because Lord of the Rings is just awesome. The fact that I am STILL reading it, yes, three months after starting it, has nothing to do with the quality of the book. It is neither boring nor hard to read. It is lovely and I regret that I have so little time for pleasure reading, or I might have been finished long ago.

Dear Classics Challenge,
Never mind.

Dear Nineteenth Century,

I love doing school in the summer when it means I get to study history. You're no exception to the fascination I have with bygone eras. Napoleon, Wilberforce, Shaftesbury, Beethoven — and that's just the first half. I am eager to learn more of the second.

Most sincerely,

Chocolate Cherry Muffins (Gluten-Free, Vegan, and Sugar-Free)

I've nothing witty to say about this recipe. It's good. Make it. Eat it. Enjoy.

Chocolate Cherry Muffins

Prep time: 10  minutes
Cook time: 25 minutes
Yield: 12 muffins

Ingredients
1 Tbl flax meal
3 Tbl water
2 cups gluten-free all purpose flour
1/4 cup cocoa powder
2 tsps baking soda
2 tsps baking powder
1/2 tsp salt
1/2 tsp xanthan gum (if your mix does not have xanthan gum, increase to 1 tsp)
2/3 cup milk of choice (I used rice milk)
1/2 cup agave nectar
2/3 cup canola oil
1/2 tsp liquid stevia
1 Tbl vanilla extract
1 cup tart cherries, fresh or frozen

Directions
Combine the flax meal and water in a small bowl. Let sit for five minutes.
Preheat oven to 325 F. Line a muffin tin with paper liners.
Whisk dry ingredients in a large bowl. Whisk together wet ingredients (including flax mixture) in a medium bowl. Form a well in the dry ingredients and pour in the wet. Stir well, then fold in cherries. Scoop 1/3 cup batter into each muffin cup. Bake 25 minutes or until a toothpick comes out clean. Let the muffins sit in the pan for 10-15 minutes before removing to a cooling rack.


Notes:
I find it helpful to use the same cup in measuring the oil and agave, so the oil comes out quicker (assuming you have a one-cup measuring cup with 2/3 and 1/2 markings).
If you've had problems with your cocoa powder clumping, push it through a strainer. It comes out beautifully fine.
This recipe is loosely adapted from this one: http://www.foodnetwork.com/recipes/blueberry-muffins-recipe2.print.html

Bon appetit!

Dairy-free, Meat-free, Gluten-free (etc. and etc.) Rice and Beans Tortilla Soup

If I were a food blogger, I would name my blog "Food Does Not Have To Be Pretty".

If I were a food blogger, this would be a really high-quality photo of my latest creation (it's from the Shire by the by). I would then tell a wildly amusing story about why or how I invented this deliciousness. Further, I would list the benefits of this dish, including what diets it is suitable for and what substitutions are possible. I would conclude by describing in creative detail the hints of tapioca flavoring and the ambience of... something.
I'm not a food blogger and I have no funny story about this soup's creation. We needed dinner, we're on a very strict and specific diet, and no recipe was quite right.
This soup is animal-product free, sugar-free, gluten-free, onion-free, tomato-free, and a whole lot of other things free (no cocoa powder here, nor lettuce, nor basil, nor pickles, nor popsicles). But what's far more important than what is not in the soup is what is. Do look below to discover that.

Rice and Beans Tortilla Soup

Ingredients

• 1 cup brown rice
• 1 Tbl olive oil
• 1 large bell pepper, chopped
• 3 cloves of garlic, minced
• 1 can black beans, drained and rinsed
• 1 can pinto (or kidney) beans, drained and rinsed
• 1 1/2 to 2 cups frozen corn
• 10 cups vegetable stock (or 7 cups vegetable stock, 3 cups water)
• 2-3 tsps chili powder
• 1 1/2 tsp cumin
• 1-2 tsps oregano
• salt and pepper to taste*
• Tortilla chips (optional, but would it be tortilla soup without tortilla chips?)

Directions

Heat olive oil on medium heat in a large pot. Sauté the bell pepper for about 3 minutes, then add the garlic and sauce for 1-2 minutes more.
Meanwhile, rinse the rice in a colander. Add it and the other ingredients (minus tortilla chips) to the large pot. Turn the heat to medium-low, put the lid on and simmer for 30-40 minutes (until rice is plump).

*If you don't put tortilla chips on top you need significantly more salt.

You could also top this with sour cream and cheese (but it wouldn't be vegan) or salsa (but that wouldn't be tomato- or onion-free).

Cheers!

Pfeffernüsse: What I baked today

I saw a package of pfeffernusse cookies in Trader Joes yesterday and almost couldn't resist buying them. I am reading a book for school about Catherine the Great of Russia and she mentions eating pfeffernusse (she's German). So obviously I needed to eat these things. But I'm glad I didn't buy them, because I made these for cheaper and got more:
Gluten-Free Homemade: Pfeffernüsse—The Best Gluten-free German Christmas...
Plus they're gluten free and delicious!

I'm going to endeavor to post a little something more regularly, but you know how ambition often falls flat. But for now, au revoir.

Recipe: Sautéed Spinach

Yes, yes, I know, I'm a lax blog author, but I really don't want to begin 30% of my posts with an apology, so I'm not going to. So there.

No, indeed, I have not the time for an apology, because I'm here to post a recipe which I hath invented this very eve!

Wild garlic in some nice part of the world. Be quiet, it's not random, it's pretty.

Braised Spinach*

Cook Time: 5-10 minutes

Serves Two

Ingredients

1 clove of garlic, minced

1/2 an onion, chopped

Olive Oil

About 1 1/2 cups chopped spinach, fresh or frozen

1 tsp lemon juice

Salt and pepper

Optional: Red pepper flakes or cooked corn

Directions

Heat a little oil (about a teaspoon or two) in a pot. Sauté onions and garlic until soft and golden. Add spinach and lemon juice, and cook until spinach is wilted. Salt and pepper generously. Garnish with red pepper flakes if desired. This is also nice with corn mixed in.

*No, this is not technically braised, but doesn't braised sound better than plain old "sautéed spinach"?

Au revoir, my readers.

Blueberry-Peach Crumble Smoothie

I don't have anything witty, thought-provoking, or just plain interesting to say. I haven't posted a smoothie recipe in a while. That's why today I'm posting…

Blueberry-Peach-Crumble Smoothie 

Prep time: 5-10 minutes
Serves: Two medium glasses

Ingredients:
¼-½ cup water
5-8 ice cubes
1 peach
¼ cup oats
1 cup blueberries

Directions:
Add all ingredients to blender; blend until smooth.

Notes:
*You can hide a handful of spinach in this smoothie; no one will know and you can get in some of your necessary greens.
*Adding a half teaspoon of cinnamon adds to the "crumble" flavor.
*All the amounts are approximate as I make smoothies without measuring cups.

Cold days, hot breakfasts

Good morning! While most of you are in school/at work I am sitting here making a lovely hot breakfast – yay homeschooling!I don't know about where you live, but here it has been cold, cold, COLD. There's no solution for that other than a hot meal (or put on two more coats).
So without further ado, your cold morning solution!

Peanut Butter Chocolate Chip Oatmeal

Serves four. Approximate time: 15 minutes

Ingredients

3½ cups water, your milk of choice (coconut, almond, cow, etc), or a combination

1¾ cup oatmeal
4 tablespoons chocolate chips (If you wanted it to be healthier, you could leave this out, or use cocoa powder instead, or even add apples)
1 tablespoon maple syrup
⅓ cup almond milk
½ cup peanut butter

Directions
Bring the water (or milk) to boil in a saucepan. Add in the oats (and apples, if using) and turn down to a medium-low simmer (really, if you want it to cook faster, you can turn it up as high as you dare, but don't let it boil over!). Simmer until the oats have absorbed all the liquid, around 10-15 minutes. Don't forget to stir! Especially towards the end, the oats will want to stick to the bottom of the pan.

While the oats are simmering...
In a small bowl, combine maple syrup, ⅓ cup almond milk and peanut butter using a hand mixer (or a whisk).  Be careful, because it will probably splash a little (it's best to remember to close your measuring spoons drawer so you don't have to stop and clean almond milk off your teaspoons… not that I'd have any experience with that).
Divide the oatmeal into four portions and serve each one with 1 tablespoon of chocolate chips and ¼ of the peanut butter mixture. Enjoy!
Notes:
If you like your oatmeal to crunch (I don't), my sister recommends cashews or peanuts. "It depends on what flavor you want," she said. "The peanuts make it more peanuty, but the cashews complement the flavor well."
If you're planning on reheating it, store the chocolate chips and the peanut butter separately. Oatmeal does reheat well.

Well, that's about all I have to say.

5-Minute Lunch – literally

Okay, so this really is a five-minute lunch.  And it's not box macaroni. It is healthy, it is tasty, and I thoroughly enjoyed eating it. Oh – and I made it up!

Ingredients

• 1 can of beans (pinto, black, kidney, etc.), or alternately you could soak and cook two cups of dried beans
• Around 1/2 teaspoon (to taste) of the following spices: dried cilantro, chile powder, paprika, cumin, garlic powder, salt, pepper ((really, you can season it how you like, this was just what we did)
• About 1 Tablespoon olive oil
• Tortilla chips
• Optional greens, tomatoes, peppers, onions, etc.

Directions

Drain the beans and rinse them. In a bowl, combine beans and spices. Heat oil in a frying pan and add in beans. Fry (stirring them so as not to let them stick to the pan) for five minutes, adding more oil if needed. Divide between bowls and enjoy with chips! Although we didn't add anything else, you could eat it with spinach or tomatoes, or fry some peppers or onions with the beans, which I'm sure would be delicious.

Serves two.

It really is that easy to make lunch.

A most delicious recipe

I simply must share. It was so delicious. So extremely delicious.

I wanted to take a picture, but I am such a terrible photographer that I decided my photos weren't worth sharing. But this recipe is.
Yesterday, my sister and I made homemade granola bars. Delicious homemade granola bars (did I already say that?).
The recipe, taken from Honest Cooking, was easy, fast, and horribly addicting. The ingredients are as follows:
2 cups oats
½ cup sugar
½ tsp salt
¼ tsp cinnamon or nutmeg (we used nutmeg)
½ cup chocolate chips
1 cup raisins
¼ to a ½ cup sesame seeds
¼ cup flax seeds
¼ to a ½ cup shredded coconut
⅔ cup peanut butter or almond butter
6 Tbsp coconut oil
¼ cup honey
1 Tbsp water

(Their ingredients were slightly different; They used less peanut butter but we had trouble getting it to come together, and even with adding more, it still kind of falls apart, so even more might be necessary. Also, they recommend olive oil but we decided coconut oil might go with the flavor better.)

Preheat oven to 350. Line a baking dish with parchment paper, then lightly grease it (We used a 8 x 8 baking dish, which worked, but I think next time we will use a larger one, since it was very thick).
Process ⅓ cup of the oats in a blender or food processor until finely ground (we actually used our nut and seed grinder [an old coffee grinder] because it was such a small amount).
Stir together all dry ingredients (oats, ground oats, sugar, salt, nutmeg, chocolate chips, raisins, seeds, and coconut). Stir in oil honey, peanut butter and water.
Spread into pan. Press firmly into the corners and edges to top is even.
Bake for 30 minutes, until top starts to brown. The edges will become deep golden and may feel underdone in the center, but that's okay. They'll firm quite nicely as they cool. (The last three sentences were directly from the recipe, and I'm not sure if they're true. Our granola bars sort of fell apart as we cut them, so I wonder if maybe cooking longer would help? But then again, I tend to overcook rather than undercook.)
Cool in pan for 20 or so minutes, then take them out of pan using parchment. Let cool completely before cutting.

Once again, I'm sorry I have no pictures to share. You will simply have to go on my word that they were wonderful, without any tantalizing pictures to tempt your tastebuds. The sweet and salty and chocolaty taste, with the hint of peanut butter… Oh, they are so good.
Thank you, Honest Cooking, for this good recipe!